IF I WERE PRESIDENT

If I were President of the United States, I would outlaw winter. And cold. And snow. Think how many jobs we could create by getting rid of winter! There would be millions and millions of Americans who would work these super turbine facilities located along the border states of the country. No cold air would be allowed in and no warm air allowed out. I'm not kidding. How many jobs would be created in the tech sector with science guys trying to invent year round summer? Shit man, it's not like they'd have a choice. I'm the President, I say no more winter...you're the geeks that invent shit, make it happen (make it so (Star Trek)). Then there'd be all the airplanes that would have to be modified to burn fuel on top of the plane to keep the cold air from sneaking in from above. There'd a ton of jobs there. And then, there'd be no planes sitting around, they'd all have to be up in the air at all times...all the pilots would have jobs again! we'd be consuming quadruple the amount of fuel as prior to my no winter edict. So this whole no winter thing would actually help stabilize the fuel market, so the price of gas would go back down to like a buck fifty, right? And if gas goes down, spending goes up by the american consumer, right? And if spending goes back up, as gas goes down, the big gas hog cars and trucks are being sold all hot and heavy again, so I've saved the auto industry too huh? I'm the freakin MAN! And with all the people moving to the border states, the housing market goes through the roof, the new and existing home sales soar like it's 1999 all over again. So, yeah, I'll put a few TV Weathermen out of work, but those guys are all assholes anyhow, so SCREW EM! I can't think of one reason why the President shouldn't do this plan. He can even say he thought of it. I don't really care, because then i'll sue him for a hundred bazillion dollars for stealing my intellectual property. He'll be impeached, disbarred, embarrassed, divorced (hello Mz Obama...ooh la la). But as long as he gives the order before he's kicked to the curb, the no winter law is a law. I should go into politics. this shit is easy. NEXT!?!!?

HI, IT'S ME. THE BLOGGER THAT DOESN'T BLOG

Hi, hello, welcome. Yeah, so maybe you've been wondering where I've been? Maybe you've checked in just to see the same thing posted every day for a straight month now? Sorry bout that. I just haven't felt up to writing. Actually, i've written a little here and there, just uninspired to finish anything. Work (or lack thereof) and life and the winter has me feeling a little blue and like i said, uninspired. Whaddya gonna do huh? And I don't really have too much to talk about tonight, but I promised a friend and told another friend that I would write tonight, so here I am. Let me dust off the keys here...spray a little windex on my screen....squirt a little WD-40 on my laptop hinges...there we go, good as new. Now then...

If you've read my stuff, i've told you before, my theory about me being the human caesura, that maybe my whole life is just a pregnant pause, since it's possible that my soul did something really evil or great in a former life...this life maybe the breather my soul needed. Could be, just thinking here.

American Idol is good this year. I usually take a season off every other season. I didn't watch last season with Freaky Adam Lambert. I just don't get that guy. But this season really seems to have made me smile a ton more than i remember, and Ellen hasn't even started. Ellen makes me smile. I really enjoyed Neil Patrick Harris (Doogie Howser MD) as guest judge tonight and I think he should replace Simon Cowell next year. He's funny, he's got talent, he's got the resume. He's got a ton of attitude, and he's just cool. He's got my vote. The show doesn't need another Simon, they just need a big personality, Doogie's got that. And who was that other guest judge? The Jonas Brother's dog or something? That mut said like 3 words the whole show. Shouldn't you have to have done SOMETHING to be a guest judge? come on! This is American Idol, not the sixth grade Christmas Show. Bad call on the Jonas mutt.

Have you seen Avatar yet? I've seen it twice. I'm going again. The story is quite predictable, and the writing is very subpar, but visually it's the most amazing thing i've seen in a theater. It's historic for what it's done for filmmaking. All I can say about what i experienced there is HOLY SHIT! If you haven't gone, go. It won't be the same on TV on DVD or whatever. See it at the theater IN 3-D!!!!

I saw Public Enemies with Johnny Depp. I have to admit, i was disappointed. I love Depp, I think he's a fine fine actor, but for me, the movie was just kinda blah. No offense. I liked the girl though...the French girl.

Back later...talk amongst yourselves...